Coincidence?

Other places at other times I have written about coincidence not really being coincidence. It isn't a new thought to me. But I was reminded how deeply I think coincidence just isn't. First, I was rewriting a chapter in one of the memoirs I have written and I was reminded about a time nearly eight years ago when my youngest graduated from high school. I was living in Maine at the time and flew to Ohio with my mother and Evan's sister to celebrate.

Was it a coincidence that the dog Evan grew up with chose to die that same weekend, a visceral show of solidarity with him? He was transitioning. She could, too.

Was it a coincidence that at our connecting city on our way back to Maine, we "happened" to see my brother and his family as they raced in an electric tram to get to their gate on time? We didn't know they were connecting through that same city. We didn't know that their first flight was two hours delayed and they should have been long gone. We had five precious minutes to see them before they left for Oslo, Norway. We wouldn't see them again for a year.

Thinking about my dog dying made me think of Stan's dog who "chose" to die just as I moved in after we were married. Again, is it a coincidence that this dog, too, seemed to know that his job was done?

I guess what really got me thinking about this issue, though, was when I saw a recent Oprah Winfrey show in which she revealed that she has a half sister she hadn't known about. The "coincidences" that had to occur in order for these two to finally meet after 47 years were beyond amazing.

I was left thinking that when we are meant to receive something, a blessing, a lesson, a healing, even a gift in the form of the death of a loved one whose time to go is so timely, it just can't NOT happen to/for us. What does happen I believe, is that we miss the coincidence, or we downplay it, or we deny it altogether.

Me? I just don't believe in coincidences. As a result, I expect them. I see them all the time.